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The Joy of Shopping….

in your own closet. Are you like me and have clothes in your closet that you know your fat ass can’t fit but can’t bear to part with for sentimental reasons or because you were once the ish when you wore it? Well, I hold on to my “skinny” clothes for both of those reasons. There’s one particular dress that holds so many wonderful memories for me.

One, I found this LBD (that’s little, black dress for all you non-fashionistas) on the clearance rack at Banana Republic for $24.99 back in 2001! It’s made of matte jersey and Lycra, and it hugged my sexy frame in all the right places. It has a v-neck slit that shows just the right amount of cleav, and it hugged my ass so sweetly. The dress was a Large which in my opinion runs kinda small at Banana, so I was even more happy to be able to fit it. This was my go-to outfit if I wanted to be the bomb!

Two, I wore the dress for my 30th birthday dinner, but it wasn’t just any old dinner. It was this massive, surprise party that Myia put together for me. I thought she and her man, and I and my man would just have a quiet dinner that night, but when we were lead to our table, all of my close family, friends, and co-workers were there. Talk about a surprise! It was one of the most memorable moments of my life. Not to mention the fact that a sista was looking “SPLA-KOW!!!!”

Lastly, this dress turned my man ON!!!! He’d get pissed if I talked about wearing it to work, and I’d always mess with his head by threatening to wear it. When I wore this dress, I knew I was gittin’ some! Ah….the memories. TMI? Whateva!

So, here the dress hangs on the back of my closet door begging to be worn. Now, I could squeeze my fat ass in it, but I’m not hardly trying to look 4 months preggers! My ass has spread a little wider than I’d like, and the stretch marks on my arms do not need any extra attention right now. BUT I’M WORKING ON IT!!!!! So, I leave you with a pic of me and the dress during the good times, and the dress looking sad and pathetic on its hanger. LBD, I’m coming baby. Hold on….